The Christmas Spirit

Many of you know that I am not a religious person, so guess what won't be discussed in this post.  I believe people are kind and caring because they recognize the need to be so and see that others also need it.  That is all.

However, I have not been in the Christmas spirit of late.  It has been a trying few months, in fact, the last 6 months since I wrecked my bike have been pretty shitty.  Things are starting to turn around, but it is happening slowly.  I know if I can just hold out, it will all work out in the end but the holidays are stressful already and not having a steady income makes it worse.

I refuse to lament on the bad though because that is the direct opposite of what I have set out to write about.  Yes, I broke my knee in a bike accident, I totalled my bike, I've lost my job, and my husband was in the hospital.  These things have all added to my stresses.  In an attempt to be less of a pessimist, here are the good things that have happened lately.

We all have our health.  We did have a bit of a scare and have been in and out of the emergency room lately, not to mention or 500 trips to the pharmacy, but we are all living and breathing and ambulatory.  As far as I am concerned, we are winning here.  That is plus number one!

I was worried about Christmas, money wise.  Now I know that is not the true meaning of Christmas and it is more about giving and kindness than getting, but my children are small and I wanted to make sure they, at least, got some joy out of the season.  We were assigned an Angel this year from a local Angel tree and she was kind enough to provide us with a few gifts.  We pooled some resources and were able to get a few other small things.  Our kids will be taken care of.

I was not sure if we would have a tree this year so I asked all of our friends to send up Christmas cards so I could fashion a tree out of them. Well, the response was nothing short of awesome, I had no idea we had so many friends willing to send us cards. A very good friend of mine also sent some little cake bits (which my kids LOVE) and somehow managed to get her friends to send us a few little monetary boosters as a surprise.  I nearly cried at the gift of money and gift cards from complete strangers.  Because of this wonderful surprise, I was able to get my kids something nice that I think they will enjoy and still have some money left over. I nearly cried at the gesture, and I am not one to cry easily.  So THANK YOU to those people.

We were also worried about not being able to see family this season.  With all we have been going through, we just didn't think we would have the time or the money.  Plus, we had to find someone to watch our tiny zoo while we were gone.  Turns out, we are pretty damn resourceful, much more so than I thought.  We may be going home giftless, but we will be going home.  I cannot wait to spend that time with people we love, see the joy one the kids' faces, eat until I want to burst, and laugh until tears are streaming down my face, because, really, that is what Christmas is all about.

I have my health, my family, and we are not so bad off as to be living on the street and starving.  Yes, it is a lean year, and those are bound to happen.  By this time next year, we will have this all figured out and we will be in a better place.  All we can do is keep moving forward and try to squeeze every last bit of enjoyment out of the time we have.

In short (haha, I'm funny) I just want to remind everyone that no matter what situation you find yourself in, keep looking forward.  Don't hang your head and wallow in your own self-pity.  I've been there, all it does is make you feel worse.  Pick that head up, put one foot in front of the other and face your troubles head on.  You may be battered and bruised, but you are not broken and if you keep fighting, you WILL win.

Holidays!!!

Good evening!!

Or night?  I dunno, it's nearly midnight.  I figured it's been awhile since I have been on here and updated about how my life was going.  We will start with the diet and exercise bit and get that out of the way.

I have not been exercising.  I know "I don't have the time" is an excuse, but to be honest, I spend all my time writing and researching.  For now, with no job, it's hard to keep up and I am constantly looking for ways to make a little extra here and there.  For now, that's writing.  I do alright with it.

As far as eating is concerned.  I don't really do much of that either.  I know, that's bad, but I'm not hungry.  I'll grab a snack or something, usually popcorn or some chicken or tuna salad and a slice of bread, but for the most part, I eat maybe on meal a day.  I tend to get up to late to eat breakfast, because I stay up late writing or researching.  I usually don't eat lunch because I know I'm going to be starting dinner almost as soon as the boys are home from school.  So, I use that time to write.

I am also looking at a few other ways to make some income.  I'm not particularly crafty and I haven't come up with a unique item that would probably sell, so I'm a little stuck there.  Still not overly worried about it.

Now, on to the good stuff.

Everyone tries to be thankful for what they've got when Thanksgiving comes around.  They do their best to look around and appreciate the wonderful people and things they have in their lives.  I am no different.  Being without a job is hard, having no money is hard, catching up is hard.  You know what?  I don't feel any hardship.  I have looked around, taken stock and come to terms with what I've got.

I have a wonderful family.  My husband and my kids are the light of my life.  My man takes care of us and, even though he tends to be a worry wart, he takes the time to hear out my next zany idea.  He is supportive of me.  What more could a girl want?  My kids.  Oh man, my kids are something else. As infuriating as they can be at time, I love the little buggers more than my life.  They have so much to offer and see the world in such interesting ways!

Over Thanksgiving break (from Thursday to Sunday) I also had many opportunities to spend time with some of my extended family.  My mom came to visit from Kansas and I spend pretty much all of Thursday through Saturday with her, either at my home or at my aunts house.  On Thanksgiving we had an awesome meal with turkey and ham and all the ooey gooey goodness that gets set on the table.  For the first time in my life I wasn't completely miserable when I finished eating, which means I did good in stopping when I was finished and didn't overeat.  It's a small accomplishment but there it is.

There was some drinking, some football, some bunko.  Oh man is bunko ever fun!  I admit we were a loud raucous group that night! My brother came over, as well as my uncles brother and sister in law. It was a relatively small gathering but still incredibly fun.

We were there again on Saturday and played some cards.  I do love cards.  Russian Rummy or some such mess is what we played, and I whooped their butts!!  I am the queen!!  My cousin came home from her trip to Kansas about then so we went ahead and played some more cards.  Lots of laughing and memories were made.

Sunday, we got an unexpected surprise.  My husbands brother, his girlfriend, her daughter and mom all came by on their way through.  They are on their way to Disney World, but made a stop so they could stretch their legs and spend some time.  It was a nice surprise and a chance to see old friends and make a new one.

In short (haha) I haven't slept much, I'm so tired and my house has been trashed, my kitchen is a total wreck, my kids are exhausted, but I am also so happy.  I am grateful to have been able to enjoy this entire time with my family, have fun, and make memories.  Weekends like this are the ones that stick with you.  They may seem like simple little things to most people, but to a few of us, these little things are the world!

I hope you did as well on your Thanksgiving as I did on mine.

I'm to tired to think of a creative title....

So, I've been on weight watchers almost a week.  Again, it's kind of a simplified calorie counter.  I haven't gotten on the actual computer yet to see if it offers different options than the app does, so I'm not sure if there's more to it.  I have logged every day, truthfully.  Since then I have been under my "points" each day.  I did use all my extra weekly points last week (beer!) But I still even have some of those bad boys left. Of course the week ends on Sunday so I still have time to screw it up.

I have no idea if I've had a weight change.  I still don't have a scale.  I'm torn on getting one because I don't want that hanging over me.  And I know the scale isn't the end all be all determinate of my success.  Still, it would be nice to know where I'm at.

I did buy a kettle bell.  My friend highly suggested it so I'll give that a try.  I may have to modify some exercises until my knee is 100 percent.  It won't even get here until friday, and I have my surgery consult on wednesday, so it may sit around for awhile.

I've tried to make an effort to move more, even little things.  I try to walk a bit faster when I'm walking, even just around at work, I have a habit to move at a sloth like pace.  No more.  I took Elliott for a walk  last weekend.  We both need some exercise but I did really enjoy it. The boys and I even walked to scouts, and even though they meet at the school which is about 1/4 mile away (if that) we still walked instead of drove and it was nice.  It was also dark on the return, so we will probably bring a flashlight next time.

Other than that, I'm trying to move more at work.  I try to get out of my chair more and work from a standing position. I even do a couple standing yoga moves to help improve my balance.  Little changes I hope will eventually make a big difference.